BNIWW Blog

5 Steps to Building Relationships

Gary Jacobs — Mon, 14 Feb 2011 19:50:08 +0000

Welcome to the BNI Western Washington Blog. Today I will discuss a podcast from September of 2009 by Dr. Ivan Misner. His guest was Ed Wallace, author of Business Relationships That Last and he talked about the “soft skill” of relationships.

Building relationships is at the core of networking. So let’s talk about the 5 steps in the system to build relationships.

Establishing Common Ground

Our first step is so basic that if you miss it there is no way to begin the relationship building process. How do we find common ground? Talk about things that might be common to both of you. For instance: hobbies, interests, past vacations, type of work, pets, family or maybe even people you have in common. Keep the conversation positive while you create the lines of communication that allow you to find those common threads. Remember, God gave you two ears and one mouth. You should use them proportionately.

Displaying Integrity and Trust

Trust is at the center of all referrals. Each time you receive a referral that referral giver is putting a little of their own creditability on the line. Your integrity directly affects that trust factor. Trust and integrity is a must in maintaining good networking relationships.

Using Time Purposefully

I was in Europe one time and the most notable difference between Americans and Europeans is the speed at which they walk. I stood on a street corner and watched with amazement at the speed of the Americans. They were all in a great hurry while the Europeans just sauntered. We have been ingrained with the time limitations we have and try to get all we can into a day. To that end none of us likes to have our time wasted or used in a manner we do not see as productive. So plan your use of time, especially if you are using someone else’s time too, so it has value to the person you are networking with.

Offering Help

No one knows how much you know until they know how much you care. So often these days we see people who want it to be all about themselves. But first we need to show we want to help others or they will often be reticent to help us. Sincerely offer your help. It diffuses the feeling of being sold. BNI’s motto is Giver’s Gain. Give of yourself and your networking partner will gladly give back.

Asking for Help

Once you have helped others they will want to help you in return. Asking for help is a great way to focus them on the type of business you want. If you don’t ask they will not know what you need and will give you some of your worst type of clients. Let them know the type of clients that work best for you and that is what you will receive.

Skipping any of these steps is like driving a car with a flat time. It is a rough ride and you never get to your destination. Remember, it is all about the journey

Living On The Edge

Gary Jacobs — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 20:41:05 +0000

On a recent trip to Las Vegas my brother-in-law expressed his desire to gamble. “I always play blackjack” he said. Unfortunately all the blackjack tables were full and he could not find a seat at one. I urged him to play three card poker with me. He begged off saying he did not know how to play the game but would watch me play. After four or five hands of me telling him what I was doing and showing him my cards he sat down and began to play. He never looked for a seat at a blackjack table for the remaining four days. He continually talked about how much he liked the game and how much fun he was having.

I began to realize how much we limit ourselves because we don’t know about a new way to make our life better or more fun. How much time did you lose calling or visiting someone before we discovered email? Has your life been more fun since you started using an IPOD, the WII, or a CD player? It was a challenge learning how to use all of those things but what a difference they have made in our lives.

Progress is a challenge. Acceptance of progress is a bigger challenge. Embrace those challenges. Each week pick out an area in your life you would like to be easier or more fun for you. Investigate what may be available to help you in that area. Then set aside some time to learn all you can about that item. It will be time well spent. Remember, if you are living on the edge you are taking up too much space. Leap over that edge and see where you land.

Be The Hub of Action

Gary Jacobs — Wed, 28 Jan 2009 03:18:25 +0000

There are many ways to market ourselves and our business. The most common is handing out business cards. That single act does more to help people remember us than most anything else. But there is one thing that is much more effective. How would you like to be the first thought on everyone’s mind. Each time they need something they think of you. Being the first one people think about creates visibility, the first step in the VCP formula (Visibility + Creditability = Profitability).

Here’s how you create that high level of visibility. Create a multi-level network. Make sure it has both width and height. List your contact sphere firms. Those are the firms that have a symbiotic, compatible, non-competitive relationship who naturally provide a source of referrals for one another. Begin to make contact with the professions you’ve listed and agree to have a reciprocal referral relationship with them.

Then create a list of firms that you should build partnerships or alliances with to better enable you to serve your market. This list may include businesses that do not fall within your contact sphere such as competitors with different specialties. Meet with them to begin building relationships. Work on joint ventures if possible.

Be sure to diversify your networks so you have access to most types of professionals your contacts would need. Start listening for conversations where people are saying what they need. Step up and tell them you know someone who can help them. Your vast and diversified network should supply the right person to help them. Remember, you can always go onto the BNIWW website and find the professional they need in another chapter.

After you help a few people in need by supplying the right professional they will think of you as the go to person when they are in need. They will tell others and pretty soon you will have lots of people calling your for your contacts. Not only will they use you for your products and services but the people you are referring to them will provide the “Giver’s Gain” effect for you. Before you know it your network has grown and your business is thriving.

Action Step: Make a list of all your contacts. Classify them by Strong and Casual Contacts. Then make a list of related professions you would like to have as allies. Now establish contact and begin the process of building a relationship with them.

How Much Do You Network?

Gary Jacobs — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 00:21:28 +0000

Do you network via email? Perhaps you send cards or letters through the mail. Do you go to meetings with people or groups of people and sit there quietly and listen? Are any of these actions your method of networking?
Let’s talk about how to grow your business through networking. First let’s define networking. Networking is the face to face building of relationships focused on obtaining business. The key to that definition is the term “face to face.” It is not sending email, talking on the phone, driving to appointments, sending out cards or letters, but FACE TO FACE building of relationships.
People in the United States average 90 minutes per day of networking. How much networking do you average per day? It stands to reason that if we control and increase our networking efforts our business will grow as a direct result of the effort put forth. I challenge you to purchase a stop watch and time your true networking over the next few days. Average it out to see what you are doing on a daily basis. Then start working to double that average time. Doubling your networking time will greatly increase your business.